Stress Starts Early, Coping Skills Do, Too
Written by Rev. Dr. Scott Paczkowski
“Anxiety in one’s heart weighs one down, but a good word makes one glad”
As busy adults, we fondly remember the wonderful childhood years when a summer afternoon felt like days when the worst problem in life seemed to be your sibling touching your stuff. But with time comes the loss of memory and tangled history of remembrance. Life was more difficult and stressful than most of us recall.
In her article in Health magazine entitled “Stress At Every Age and Stage,” Ingela Ratledge Amundson points out that as early as infancy and preschool, children face stress. The challenge is helping them cope. “For infants and preschoolers, the majority of stress comes from not having their basic needs (food, sleep, affection) met. As tots mature, spending time with playmates can be an additional source of stress and conflict – ‘That’s myyy Thomas the Train!’” But even at these early stages of life, there are “Coping Strategies.”
Amundson affirms that since food and sleep are the centers of small child life, the more parents can provide the right kind of structure necessary to let them feel the structure and consistency of a regular eating and sleeping process, the more secure their child feels. Of course, regularity is easier said than done, and tantrums are a natural but frustrating addition. Yet, structure and consistency are the keys. When infants and small children know the consistency, their stress level lowers.
If you are a parent, understand that stress is not just part of your life but also part of your child’s life as well. You can add to your child’s stress, but often they create it on their own. All we, as parents, can do is provide security in structure and help them feel loved even during a tantrum. Prayerfully ask God to give you the patience and coping skills to face your stress before addressing your child’s stress. Also, forgive yourself in advance. None of us have been perfect parents, but with God’s supportive care, we can at least be less anxious, and that can only help your child’s natural stress.
