Judging Faithfully
written by Rev. Dr. Scott Paczkowski
“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment”
I can be a judgmental person. I am not as judgmental with those I do not know. I am the most judgmental with those I care deeply for and myself. For example, I have been judgmental of my denomination because I care deeply and therefore have high expectations. I also know God has blessed me in so many ways that I have the responsibility to honor God in return. I am hard on myself when I do not live up to those expectations. Forming judgments is not bad; they can be a blessing. It is important to live a life knowing and acting in a healthy and appropriate way. Judgments become a problem when my natural impatience informs my judgments.
When one of my favorite writers, Thomas Oppong wrote an article on the subject, I had to read it. Oppong writes in “For Happier And Healthier Relationships, Learn to Be Less Judgmental,” a quote from Jiddu Krishnamurti; “The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” This is where patience comes into play. If we can be patient enough to withhold judgment, at least for a while, we give evaluation the opportunity to find a healing approach. It is easy to condemn. It takes patience and evaluation to make reconciliation possible.
Again, Oppong quotes another person who expresses wisdom on the subject. It was Earl Nightingale who said, “When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.” Judgment is a powerful tool and should be used carefully. The more we are able to empathize and appreciate the other person’s background and situation, the more integrity we will bring to each situation. Oppong continues, “Judging others defines who we are-our fears, insecurities and shortfalls. The urge to judge is often rooted in our vulnerabilities.” Until we come to terms with our fears, insecurities and shortfalls, we will mishandle our powerful and necessary tool of judgment.
Today, pray for God to bring you the Divine wisdom to know thyself. Prayerfully ask God to help us evaluate truthfully our fears, insecurities and shortfalls. Then, ask God to give us the courage to respond in a way that brings healing to ourselves and others. When we do, we will be able to name what requires judgment, but in a way that is less alienating and more supportive, so unity and love will have room to grow.
