The Courage to be Honest
Written by Rev. Dr. Scott Paczkowski
“My sheep hear my voice. I know them, and they follow me. ”
We all have voices within our own soul, some are blessed and guided by God’s Spirit, while others have been sad voices from within our subconscious that try to keep us from fulfilling our God-given call. “Pilgrimage of the Soul,” by Phileena Heuertz, provides a window into this example of negative self-evaluation. Here are examples the author provides of her honest voices: “Phileena, you are what others need you to be. You are only as good as you are able to meet the needs of others. You exist for the sole purpose of supporting others and helping others realize their dreams. Those dreams that your mother sang of in the morning hours are not yours to be had. You have no dreams to be realized. You don’t need dreams. Your purpose as a godly woman is to elevate others to realize their dreams.”
Listen to the ways Phileena described her own negative language. It is amazing Phileena was able to write this book or remain productive. But, if I am honest with myself, and many of you feel similarly, it is amazing we’ve been able to make a productive life with the negative voices within ourselves. All of us have many reasons to fail. It takes an act of will, and Divine support, for each of us to move forward, and risk, in order to make a difference in this world.
First, rather than jump right in, abusing yourself for the negativity within yourself, instead, applaud the good you’ve been able to accomplish. Second, look in your own “window” the way Phileena did. Write down the words your negative voice continues to whisper in your ear. Only then will you be able to address and overcome them rationally. Try to step outside yourself and treat your list as someone else’s. Do this because we ordinarily treat other people better than we treat ourselves.
Third, recognize that these inner statements are false, or at least warped in such a way to keep you from being productive. Today, write down those statements, and review them honestly. Seek forgiveness for any morsel of truth. Then, ask God to remove the false statements from your inner voice. Then, conclude by thanking God for the ways you’ve been able to succeed in spite of the negative inner-talk. When we do this, that inner voice becomes more honest, and less abusive. As this occurs, our lives become more positive, and a feeling of healing will take place in your life. Thank you, Phileena, for the courage to be honest with us, so we can be honest with ourselves.
