Responding to Rudeness

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, a wise person quietly holds it back. (Proverbs 29:11)

There are many reasons why our world seems ruder than just a few years ago. Yes, our society is more politically separated. People feel that it is giving them permission to be hostile to everyone they disagree with, or to whom they feel are different. In addition, COVID and its variants are still hanging over our heads. Diseases are frightening, and life is more exhausting as we realize our community health prospects will not improve soon. Then add inflation, the threat of recession, and all the irritants that previously existed, and you have an explosive social concoction.

Rather than complaining about rude people, it is our task as God’s ambassadors to respond reliably. “How to Stay Calm when Someone Insults You,” by Darshak Rana, provides techniques for retaining composure and integrity amid social trials. Rana describes the negative, “Instead of proving ourselves right, we try to prove the others wrong. This creates an insulting atmosphere.” Rana guides us to create an air of calm amid the emotional violence we must sometimes endure. First, Rana challenges us to “Console oneself.” Do not push your feelings aside; speak to yourself with words of comfort and healing. You didn’t deserve the hostility. No one does!

Second, “Stop justifying our Negative responses.” Yes, the rude person is wrong, but two wrongs do not make a right. We can bring sanity to insane comments by remaining calm and modeling emotional stability. Third, according to Rana, “Always remember, ‘It is about them, not me.” Their pain is causing them to lash out at you. Simply knowing this fact can provide the emotional separation necessary to respond appropriately.

Finally, “Contradict other’s rude behavior.” An appropriate response might mean confronting the rude person, but often confrontation does not provide a resolution because unhealthy people struggle with rational understanding. Instead, you can also contradict the other’s rude behavior within your mind, heart, and soul. When you evaluate your discomfort, healing takes place before pain and self-loathing can take a foothold. Pray about your response to rudeness, but also practice these recommendations to remain faithful when all around you seem cruel.

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