God’s Command to Listen
Know this, my beloved brothers and sisters: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. (James 1:19)
We can learn good listening skills, but we must nurture them. We are called to listen for God’s still small voice. We are blessed with the divine promise that God listens to us through prayer. We witness continual examples of women and men listening to God throughout sacred Scripture. Often, God speaks through other people, and it is incumbent upon us to listen to others because there are times when listening to others is God’s voice talking through them.
The author I regularly quote, Nick Wignall, comes to the discussion of wisdom through the mistakes that keep us from listening well. In “4 Habits Good Listeners Avoid,” Wignall claims, “Being a good listener is about what you do less of, not more of.” Good listeners learn to focus on healthy tendencies that nurture focus and concentration. To concentrate well, we must stop “Trying to ‘Win’ Conversations.” Almost all conversations are not about winning but about relating and supporting. Even focus can be harmful. Wignall proclaims, “Focusing on the Problem, not the person.” Instead of fixing the problem, we are called to connect with the person.
Next, Wignall warns us against “Invalidating Other People’s Feelings.” When we feel uncomfortable with a conversation, we often attempt to quash the person’s feelings rather than experience their mood and our own. Most of us would rather eliminate the discomfort than sit in it and remain focused on the other person. Finally, you cannot listen well by “Ignoring Your Own Feelings.” You can concentrate on the other person while recognizing the emotions within your heart and mind. Identifying your feelings as you listen will help you acknowledge them and give you the confidence to put them aside for evaluation later.
God is calling you to nurture your listening skills. People use their bodies, stories, and emotions, and your listening skills must focus on the whole person to hear, understand, and care. Jesus modeled listening humbly, without the need to win. Jesus was able to concentrate on the person rather than fixing the situation. Jesus felt compassion and could exude his concern, so the other person knew Jesus cared. Practice listening so you, like Jesus, can provide lasting care in people’s lives.